Take the quick cyber quiz below with your teen or tween to get you both talking about this issue. Both of you should answer the questions as honestly as possible. You may be surprised by what you learn about each other. Check your responses at the end of the quiz:

1. My cellphone is useful in my life because:
   1. It keeps me in contact with friends and family and helps me with work or school-related issues.
   2. It ensures that I know everything that is going on in my circle – all the gossip about who is dating who and who wore what.
   3. It enables me to keep tabs on people anytime, anywhere.
2. If my cellphone was taken away from me for three days and I could not use or see
   1. Frustrated and irritated because I would not be able to contact anyone to make work
      or school arrangements.
   2. Angry, irritated and a bit worried. What if I’m missing out on important gossip and fun
      conversations between friends?
   3. Alone and scared. Anyone could be saying anything about me and I would not know
      or be able to fight back.
3. I go onto Mxit, Facebook or any other type of cyber chat space:
   1. about once a week.
   2. when I want to talk about something or someone specific – about three times a week.
   3. everyday for as long as I can – I am addicted.
4. When I go onto Facebook or Mxit I feel…
   1. Great – it is a good way to catch up with friends.
   2. Scared – you never know who may say something mean about me.
   3. Scared and excited – I know it’s wrong but it’s cool to see who is being talked about…
      hopefully it is not me.

Mostly As – you are using technology in a healthy way – to communicate with friends and
make appointments. Make sure that you keep up these healthy cyber relationships.

Mostly Bs – You are having lots of cyber fun but be careful about what you say on the Internet.
Remember – if you wouldn’t say it in public or to someone’s face, don’t say it in cyber space!

Mostly Cs – You may end up being a victim or a perpetrator of cyber bullying and the
consequences of this could be very damaging. You need to fi nd ways of using technology
more positively in your life. Check out the helpful hints alongside.

Helpful anti-cyber bullying hints

• Learn as much as you can about technology so that you can talk to your teen or tween about it. Keeping the lines of communication open is important.
• Ensure that if your teen or tween uses a computer at home, it is in a public space.
• Ensure that your teen/tween knows how to recognise cyber bullying.
• Ensure that your teen/tween knows the consequences of cyber bullying.
• Encourage your teen/tween to report cyber bullying if he/she knows that it is happening. Even if it is not happening at school, cyber bullying has an impact on relationships and learning at school. Encourage your teen/tween not to be a bystander cyber bully.
• Give your teens/tweens the following messages about cyber bullying:
  • If you would not say something to someone’s face, don’t say it online. “If you can’t say it – don’t send it!”
  • Do not try to resolve arguments online.
  • Do not put anything on the Internet that you would not put on the front page of a newspaper.
  • Cyber bullying has long-lasting and far-reaching consequences for the perpetrator and the victim.

Numbers to call for help:
South African Police Service
emergency number: 10111
Childline – 0800 05 55 55
Crime stop – 08600 10111
Suicide helpline – 0800 567 567
Mental health line (for depression
and anxiety) – (011) 262 6396